Hijack: Slow Club

A little while ago, we sent out a few emails asking musicians whether they’d care to guest-post on SK. We had some interesting responses, but one of our favourites came from Slow Club’s Charles Watson, who wrote us a short story entitled ‘Have You Seen Coconut?’ We hope you like it as much as we did. – Ed.

‘Have You Seen Coconut?’

by Charles Watson

There was once a little boy. He was often caught out clawing at the moon by the other children. He longed to reach the mainland. Every night he and his best friend Coconut would watch the lights of the town across the water light up as it got darker.

Everyday started the same. Breakfast was at 6.30am and then they would head into the fields. But on this particular morning Coconut wasn’t at breakfast. The boy asked his father, “Have you seen Coconut? His father replied, “I saw him walking into the field before breakfast”. When the boy and his Father got to the field the boy asked the field keeper “Have you seen Coconut?” “I saw him running away from the field towards the beach when I came to open the field this morning,” he replied.

The boy made his way down to beach. There were many beaches on this part of the coast but only one accessible by foot. The unpredictable tides were said to have eaten many escaping horses and left only their shoes that hit each other in the low tides. He knew this place was dangerous and that if Coconut had been here, there was only one place he could find out.

At the end of the beach there were a set of stairs carved out of the cliff. At the top of the cliff there was a lighthouse. Inside the lighthouse on the very top floor even above the light itself lived a man. The boy climbed the stone stairs. He dug his fingernails into the grass on the top of the cliff and with all his might pulled his skinny body over the top.

Wiping the sweat from his brow, he charged towards the lighthouse door. As he approached the door it opened and the stairs were lit already as if he was expected. He ran all the way to the top, past the light, up to the top floor. In the corner of the room sat the man in a chair facing out to sea. The boy asked, “Have you seen Coconut?” The man replied, “Yes, I have seen Coconut” and pointed out to sea. “He doesn’t swim,” said the boy. How would he get to the mainland without a boat? The man proceeded to tell the boy that Coconut had tried to reach the other side but had not followed his instructions and so had failed to make the crossing. The boy started to cry. “What were your instructions, Sir?” “You wouldn’t want to know boy, no-one ever follows them precisely.” “But I want to know, I want to save Coconut. I want to bring him home.”

The boy pleaded to be given the instructions. Eventually the old man turned his chair round and stood up.

“You must stand on folly rock for three days and three nights”, he said. “And when the tide is exactly between your knee and ankle you can move to the volcano. You must stay here for two full tides, and only then will your friend come back to you.”

He began wading through the dead horses rusting shoes. After three exhausting hours he found folly rock.

He stood there as the man from the lighthouse had instructed. The boy got weary and hungry. The salt water rose up his chest around his neck and up to his chin. He almost became weightless by the water. He knew that he had to maintain himself in this one spot. He ducked his head under the water and dived to the bottom. He tied the weeds round his feet and swam back to the surface. Only his mouth and nose were out of the water. He stayed there all night long while the fish became acclimatized to his lifeless body. In moments of despair the boy would cry out for Coconut.

The boy untied himself from the seabed and waded towards Volcano Island. Volcano Island was a small mound of volcanic dust that rose above sea level. He sat there and waited. For days he didn’t speak. On the last day as the boy was sleeping a gull landed next to him. He woke up and looked at the gull. He asked the gull, “Have you seen Coconut?” The gull nodded its bill. He said he saw Coconut’s body floating in the weeds. The boy screamed for Coconut to come back to life but he was lost forever.

Slow Club’s debut album ‘Yeah So’ is out now on Moshi Moshi Records, and their current single is ‘Trophy Room’ (video below). Their new festive EP ‘Christmas, Thanks For Nothing’ is released on 14th December.